Feeling down ...
My life is such a bore, there's so many things i wanna do but im not doing anything other than sleeping. Everytime when i tell myself that i should not waste so many hours of my time bumming and do something constructive, the next moment i feel myself crumbling down because i dont wanna do anything alone.
Miss the times when i could spend my day/night with someone i wanna spend the rest of my days with in cuddles and randomness but there's nobody there and i will start thinking of the past because only in the past could i feel him.
But what has passed has passed and i need to move on but its so hard to move alone because ive been alone for so long and im starting to feel the fear. I dont wanna be alone no more.
I wish i could do something about my life, but i just cant do it on my own.
Merry Christmas !! Hope everyone had a good break, im on super long weekend this week. yayness! starting work only on Wed for 2 days before another long weekend. Shioks max yo!
Anyway, Christmas this year was very normal, nothing way out of the norm but aint complaining cos i think im getting too old to party already!
Received a very surprised christmas present from James and its sitting nicely on my ear lobes now and best thing? No infection! I havent wore earrings for damn long cos it always give me infection even when i wear silver. White gold rocks your socks!
Been to two weddings in December and eating way too much cos there's always empty seats at the table im placed so you can imagine me eating twice as much.
I wanna go for carousel buffett and i have this bad craving for crab and ice cream. Food hunt anyone?
Last but not least, have a great new year peeps. Im so looking forward to 2010 because i realised i was living in my own lost world 3/4 this year and it seriously sucks cos i dont even know what had been going on.
So 2010 is gonna be ooomphshiokadoodoo
Today's your big day .. and i dont even know how i should be feeling.
As cliche as it sounds, but yes, cant imagine this is happening to me.
"The man i love is marrying someone today, but the bride isnt me"
As you might have all already know, im such an emo freak and i am no longer bothered to update this space because everything that's happening around me sucks and i dont wanna remember those sucky moment so i rather not blog. I hope God stop torturing me this way and make my life more fulfilling and happier so i can fill you in with all the fancy moments i have day to day.
So till then .............
* yours truly.
amber.ruoxuan\\twenty\
* mates.
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20051987\\single\\operations analyst @ credit suisse\\friendster*
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